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February 25, 2020
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The Forest or the Piss?
OfflineAn excerpt from “The Forest or the Piss” by Basil Bombadee, to be sung to a bawdy tap-house.
....
The adventurers were set upon
by large, ferocious badgers
the druid, Mako, friends had made
and soon the fight was done
Soft-hearted were the company
No bloodshed did they make,
the badgers sleeping peacefully
due to Mako’s strong animal husbandry
Still the rescuing was not yet finished
only the servants had been saved
the viscount in the forest lay
its dangers still unwitnessed
To save the servants one and all
a plan was swiftly hatched
to make badgers of all of them
to cover them with piss and prevent a future brawl
Musked they would all be secure
while the adventurers went on further
to the Pel Brolenon Woodland
their return still unassured
The fair orc Seta would have it none
no piss would she abide
The adventurers would not let her die
when their story had so soon begun
And so they entreated mightily
this organized orcish maid
that should she not drench herself
she’d be eviscerated violently
They posed to her the last dilemma
her honor would ever know
to come with them to Pel Brolenon
or scent herself a badger fella
The forest or the piss?
The forest or the piss?
The rending claws of badger death
Or the forest’s dark abyss?
The forest or the piss?
The forest or the piss?
The rending claws of badger death
Or the forest’s dark abyss?
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