I have internally debated for quite some time about whether or not to document my travels. Writing down my current affairs only condemns me to accept and validate my life of wretchedness and impresses on my soul how far I have fallen. I resent the life I have been forced to lead. This was not my destiny. These merciless thoughts have hardened me and pressed me to choose to forget (or at least look upon with contempt) my current situation once I am restored to my rightful place.

Hence, I was puzzled when I wandered into a merchant’s stall presently and found myself purchasing a small leather-bound journal, quill and inks. How duplicitous I am! I cannot stay true to my own intentions.

I have stared at the journal for some time and have finally come to the eventuality that perhaps there is some redemption to be found here. There may be something of value in this place, or imaginably, in the company I travel with. Let me impress this first; they are not anything like Drow Elf nobility. Yet, they are still… tolerable.

Let us first speak of the Halfling Vani. I would not associate with such a creature normally, except that she did save my life. She irritates me terribly, except I see that she unifies our group, has an infectious optimistic curiosity and everyone genuinely seems to look out for her well-being. Ren, the half-orc, I have grudgingly come to respect as an absolute beast on the battlefield. She swings her anchor with such deadly force that even I have chosen to tread lightly around her. I do pray that she sheds her absurd cheer and idealisms that can only lead to ruin for her or our band. The human, Dorian… Dorian I have the most quarrels with. He is pompous, rude and arrogant when he envisions himself as charming, refined and courteous. He fashions himself a leader and finds us the odd job to do. Granted he has made some lucky decisions that have worked in favour of our group, I still wish he did not believe his decision making superior to my own. Not that I desire the role of leadership, just that there is a lack of vision in our group when it comes to such grand planning. I do what I must. There is also the gnome, Jean or J, in our group. She confuses me greatly. I feel that there is much more to her than she is revealing, yet I cannot judge what. Her secrets will be revealed in due time, of that I am certain. Our dear bird, Krissy is the name she is going by at the moment, is a strange thing. I have never in my life encountered such a creature as her. Even I admit that she is quite beautiful to behold but it is unfortunate that she is so innocent of mind. Perhaps it is for the best. If she knew the value of the gold she wore, she would surely disappear while we slept. Ildan, my human companion, is my constant warder. Impenetrable. Unknowable. Solid. I know he would sacrifice himself first before letting any harm befall me.

Reading over my words, perhaps I have found a home and a family with T.I.P. so far away from the life I wanted and knew. Our recent fight against those disgusting insect monstrosities fortified my belief that we are an efficacious and forceful band of fighters and warriors who may hold some value when we are together. Let us hope this is not a mirage, some delusional part of myself that yearns to play into a fantasy world of hope and promise. Perchance I will want to remember all of this someday. For that reason, I will write.

Narcel'Uss Tanorthal