Dear Diary,

Tomorrow I'm going to let Axolotl chop off my head. Well, "let" is a strong word. It's more that I expect to fail to be able to prevent the chopping. Also, it's not entirely clear which bits of me he'll chop off, but I rather expect that they'll be sizeable and fairly important.

My real hope is that I'll be able to negotiate with him. He's not unreasonable.

Okay, he's not always entirely unreasonable. He has ideals and aspirations, and he's always more open to new ideas after he's beaten me at something. I just need to survive the beating. Maybe mallow can do the talking while he gloats over my corpse.

Maybe I'll beat him. It could happen. I'm better than I used to be. Maybe he's not. I'm not sure what my plan is if I win. My only experience for Axolotl losing a fight is when Hypatia would beat him up, and then he'd come and beat me. I mean, I'm not going to kill him. He's my brother.

Why can't things be more like they are in Dad's comic books? Sorry... graphic novels. 

Yours for at least another day,

Mauritius, Wielder of the Panther's Claw, Earl of Wending